The Goblin Capital is embroiled in a shiftless tide of endless summers. They’ll tell you about seasons and heat waves and cold fronts and storm months, but its best to ignore what they say. ⁣
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Its not their fault, they’re merely victims of a stagnant climate, trying to punctuate the crawl of time in some way or another. But distinguishing constant heat and constant rain from constant heat and constant rain is a task reserved for the chronically bored and the clinically insane, which those amateur Goblin meteorologists very well may be.⁣

Epochs ago, our goblin friend was a measly little fish off the shores of Pangea. This, he remembered, for how could anyone forget the mollusk-rich Panthalassic Ocean of yore?⁣
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But how he got to this point, a boil-ridden, bipedal swine, standing in the heart of the Yucatán, he could not recall. Much time had passed, but few clues were left. What a strange world, he thought.⁣

At that moment, without reason or provocation, a meteorite tore through the firmament, blotted out the sun, and caved into earth with such tremendous impact that at once, all meaningful life ceased to exist. ⁣

In but a single lifetime this primitive tree goblin made the great expedition from ocean to land.⁣
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In doing so, he forsook his fins for branches, proverbially pawned off his gills, and planted his roots in a miserable suburb not his own. ⁣
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Now, in the twilight hours of his career, with the Precambrian Explosion behind him, with all his megafauna peers long extinct, and with not a single goblin neighbor left with which to commiserate, he rubs flint against tinder, dries his lips, and welcomes the blissful flame.

In the blink of a millennia, things change.⁣⁣⁣⠀
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There was no God nor Narrator to tell him this. And yet our little goblin knew, deep down in his walnut-sized brain, that the halcyon days had long passed. ⁣⁣⁣⠀

⁣⁣“Where has my forest gone?” he must’ve thought in his own primordial way. The forest, his forest, had grown skinny and meager and barren and silent. ⁣⁣⁣⠀
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The goblin’s stomach growled, and at once he leapt from the canopy, never to climb up it again.